Wedding celebrities

Ok, it's kinda obvious that i have just attended a wedding. The usual yada yada. Thank goodness I went with my ex coursemates coz they kept me company. Now there is something pretty cliche in a wedding, to be specific, the typical chinese one. I finally found out something. More like discover from the careful observation. Every wedding have a certain "type" of people who would grace the occasion and they make themselves rather high profile. Now, let me classify them as top ten wedding celebrities! And here goes the list!

1. Drunkards. This one is for sure in every chinese wedding. They got so drunk and start to yell at each other telling everyone that they are not drunk. Then their red face just signify how big a liar they are.

2. The typical karaoke singers. I guess this one is gonna fade away soon. Coz nowadays gone are the songs like "wu yan de jie ju", "ai bia jia eh nyia","na si wa wu ji ba ban" would be sang like a few times. Yes! A few times. and worse, by the same person a few times. These days they bring in more closer to home songs. Yet, like every wedding, they will show off their truly out of tune and out of place singing in a terribly irritating way.

3. Kids. Yap! They run around like some crazy dogs bound for centuries. Wat is worse, no one can control them. Even if they can, its a wedding and ur not suppose to scold them.

4. Old aunties in their really old attire. Remember those really old aunties in their Sam fu or cheongsam. I am so gonna miss them. Yet, they grace the occasion like super star. Usually everyone will make way for them. Old age mah..

5. Some ang moh, guai lou or even negro. They will be the highlight of the day. Imagine in the sea of china beng faces, pop out one caucasian or an ebony. They will definitely catch ur eye.

6. Relatives that cant stop talking and talking. They will talk from one table to another as if it is their own son or daughter's wedding. One strange thing, they will always carry a bottle of wine with them.

7. Bored to death ppl with bored to death faces. They make up the majority. They will always come early and start to give masam muka. Waited for 2 hours alraedy. wat u expect. If they are lucky, their Iphone supply endless games. Yet, even these fails sometimes. I am not sure why but next time i am bringing my a sleeping if i ever try to make it early to anotehr chinese wedding.

8. The dai kam jie. She is the one with that bloody good cantonese vocab that helps the newly wed to the yamsing thingy. AND ALWAYS GOT SOME DIRTY JOKES ONE!

9. Friends or familiar faces. Kinda think of it, in every wedding, u almost bump into ur ex-primary school mates, or ex colleague, or that someone whom u see, exchange number and start asking ppl what the hell is his name again?

and the last but not least

10. Ex girlfriends and ex boyfriends. Alamak, this one quite sensitive so cant elaborate.

There u have it. If u dun fall into one of the above category, then u are sure to be just an ordinary guest. Enjoy ur wedding!